Brian Cook Presents

The Department of Motor Vehicles is better known by its fear-inducing abbreviation: DMV. Just the mention of it conjures up visions of long waits, frumpy employees, miles of red tape and the queerest cross-section of society you can find in one place. It’s a place everyone avoids for as long as they can, but eventually nearly everyone has to go. The same, of course, can be said of death. Unfortunately, my need for a real car was dire with my beloved 1990 Celebrity Eurowagon, Big Red, threatening to crap out on me with every turn of the engine.  Therefore, I identified a suitable replacement, agreed a fee, gathered the paperwork and braced myself for my own purgatory at the DMV.

I firmly believe in being pleasant and polite with people who are doing their jobs, particularly in service industries. Judging by the scenes at the DMV, many people don’t share that belief. Still, I like to think that such a positive outlook makes experiences like a visit to the Department of Motor Vehicles far more tolerable for everyone involved. It was with that frame of mind that I went to take care of business, and despite having to wait for 3 hours in line and being told that a $32 property tax from two years ago prevented me from registering my new car, I tried to stay upbeat. Of course, I couldn’t drive home then, as was my plan, and everyone who could give me a lift was otherwise occupied. So then there was a 2 hour wait in the parking lot. I won’t say I was in the best of humor, but everything got sorted out the following day, leaving me to muse about possible ways to improve the DMV. Here’s what I came up with:

Let the employees take turns picking the music that plays over the loudspeakers. Facing up to combative people all day must take a toll on them, and hearing their favorite song come on would certainly lift their spirits a bit. I don’t think anyone likes the Muzak that plays there now, so anything would be a step up.

Put a big sign outside with the line numbers counting down. There are picnic tables, a river and a park by the Wethersfield DMV, and other DMVs have or should have similar attractions adjacent to them. Why force everyone to sit in a room for fear of missing their number? Let them go outside, soak up some sun, play with their kids and pets, whatever. Anything is better than sitting in a stuffy room glaring at the employees behind the counter.

Give the idlers sitting in the room something productive to do. I was lucky to find a crossword puzzle, but most of the hundreds of people in the room just sat and stared ahead with their eyes glazed over. Let them pedal some stationary bikes and provide power for the building, or having a knitting instructor teach them how to make clothes for the homeless. Let them paint a mural or learn algebra. Just harness the free time of thousands of people each day in a positive way.

Finally, make as much as possible web-based. Documents that require signatures and ID are obviously difficult to process online, but cutting down on the number of people forced to physically go to the DMV will save the time and resources of the state and its citizens.

That’s my take on what could be improved. If you’ve got other ideas, leave a comment and be heard!

Tags: 2 Comments